Best Witty Quotes to Inspire, Uplift & Motivate You Every Day

“....Charles laughingly observed,'Gospel and the blues are really, if you break it down, almost the same thing. It's just a question of whether you're talkin' about a woman or God.”

“You’re glowing. And that only happens for two reasons — you either won the lottery or you got laid.”

“Name, profession, and psychological stability level, considering he thought it was a good idea to send a bouquet to your mother.”

“[Christianity] is in fact the religion of those who have been disinherited and condemned by life. Contrary to all vitalism and all worship of the healthy and strong, Christianity sees life better preserved by those who have already died once.”

“Life is too short to be anything but happy. So kiss slowly. Love deeply. Forgive quickly. Take chances and never have regrets. Forget the past but remember what it taught you.”

“I don't want to be caught with my pants down.”

“Life is too fleet for onomatopoeia.”

“Warm, aquamarine eyes stared into him—providing a lifeline to shore. And he wondered if she was really the one who needed saving . . .”

“Their lips met in a slow, languid kiss. Salt from her tears mixed with her natural sweetness. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed closer. Her softness, her scent, she filled and overran his senses. He mouthed another kiss against her lips. Heat flared inside his abdomen when she opened her mouth, and kissed him back with firmer lips.”

“I've come to the point where I never feel the need to stop and evaluate whether or not I am happy. I'm just 'being', and without question, by default, it works.”

“Hasta la vista, baby.”

“Jeremiah has come to see life as a serious of motions he must enact towards its conclusion.”

“A person is wise if he listens to millions of advice and doesn't implement any of it.”

“There was a time when skepticism was an act of rebellion. Since to a degree I both believe in evolution and have faith, I can only conclude that, as prophesied, to have faith will someday be an act of rebellion.”

“Histories make men wise; poets, witty; the mathematics, subtle; natural philosophy, deep; moral, grave; logic and rhetoric, able to contend.”

“Life is too short to be anything but happy. So kiss slowly. Love deeply. Forgive quickly. Take chances and never have regrets. Forget the past but remember what it taught you.”

“Whenever I think of something but can't think of what it was I was thinking of, I can't stop thinking until I think I'm thinking of it again. I think I think too much.”

“This is the fast lane, folks...and some of us like it here.”

“The problem with a life spent reading is you know too much.”

“Yes. Reyn is our resident horse master. He has an excellent seat.”

“Everyone has a sense of humor. If you don't laugh at jokes, you probably laugh at opinions.”

“Ask me no questions, and I'll tell you no fibs.”